Dancer, model and TV host Cheryl Burke posted a YouTube video recently in which she opens up about her sobriety struggles. The Dancing with the Stars personality has spoken before about her alcoholism in the past but has recently found herself battling the thoughts of relapse.
The dancer, who has been sober for three years now, said in the video that resisting the urge to relapse has been difficult.
“I’m here to confess that lately staying sober has been a little bit of a challenge for me,” she says. “And recently I’ve been thinking a lot, I have to admit, about drinking again. So, I decided to hold myself accountable by confessing my anxious feelings.”
The star also confessed that this isn’t the first time these feelings have surfaced. “I basically quit cold turkey, but to say I’ve never looked back would be a lie,” she explained.
A recent vacation to Hawaii with her husband Matthew Lawrence was particularly triggering. Burke shared that feeling “carefree…under the sun” was hard to reckon with. Especially since her husband had a glass of champagne.
Other triggers, Burke said, have arisen in the form of life stressors.
“There’s so much chaos going on in my life right now. In the past, everyone always used to say, ‘How do you do it all?’ But I did it all because I was numbing through it all. Now, for the first time, through all the chaos, I’m actually having to feel it and be uncomfortable while I’m feeling it.”
Despite these thoughts and feelings, however, Burke plans to push through with her sobriety and continue to hold herself accountable. The dancer says that she is “committed to staying sober,” and addresses the feeling of anxiety that comes with her urges to drink again. “Some days can be harder than others. I know that my feelings are completely normal, so I’m trying not to feel shame or judge myself, but it’s hard.”